Had a beautiful dream. I
haven’t seen such a beautiful dream for a long time. It was a funeral, but
everybody was in the Japanese sport hall. Facing each other. Me and my brother
next each other, doing seiza. And probably my cousin.
In front of us, there are bunch of adult people,
seems like they are waiting for photograph to be taken. You know for memory
they take photos.. traditional one, so some people are sitting and some
standing, some on the standing base. My dead grand mother was there, my mother’s
side. And maybe her dead brother( could not recognise but my brother or someone
told me that is our relatives) and possibly my grandfather. No father’s side.
I was happy, so excited, in a dream I don’t
even remember they were dead. Oh yes. I was little child in the dream. And they
were so young. Probably younger age than when I was born. Forgot that was funeral
(I didn’t really care most of the time anyway). So I was looking for my mum, as
I was happy to see all my relatives being ‘young’ I was looking for my mum who
must be young as well.
She appeared with beautiful smile, approached to
us, I was not sure when I was young I was jealous to my brother, but I didn’t
feel that this time. So young and beautiful. Every moment she moves, I can see
the aura and brightness. I was just staring at her, my eyes follows wherever she
goes, yes I was like that when I was child. Almost like fall in love with her. Even
a moment if I wasn’t with her, I die. I cried. I know my mother hasn’t been
dead! But I was so happy to see her. I totally remember that feeling, and now I
do not care about her so much. We hardly talk each other. I was afraid that she
would notice as I was staring at her all the time. Because I knew my body was
child but my mind was in a present.
I heard that when people die all you remember is
about our own mother. Mother is precious for everyone. All the mother have to
act like muse and respectful, which is tough job I guess. And I feel again that
we must respect women more.
Somehow I felt, I had to
create master piece, beautiful music and art that people cry. I must do it.
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