2015/11/14(13night) Excavation Dream

Very Realistic dream.

I dreamed about archaeology. I was there. It looks like middle east, maybe in the dessert. Two big places for digging. One was big maybe like 10sqm and covered or not covered by a house. The another one, 5sqm. I was there with a female friend or one of my assistant,  I don’t remember who that is. She had a short hair. Maybe… a bit dim. But the sun light coming from the window. The house was basic.. yes. Made of bricks. The hole.. is constructed with bricks or wood to protect the surrounding. Smell of soils. Yes the ground was soil. There were some stuff already dag out. Object C(see the drawing20151114-01) it was like tile. Well it was dag out most of them is still in the soil. About 30cm below from the ground. It seems strong structure. Container? Maybe we are seeing the lid? And Object A, structured by wood or stone. Piled with many of wooden or stone log. There mustn’t have any space inside but I assumed that there is a mummy inside. I thought this is coffin. It looked like tower. About 1 and half meter. I found object B, made of porcelain, looked like big button. Some decollation on top, flower? Behind is flat. I said “what is this?” and I threw away ( I don’t throw things…) a hard sound echoed in the room. I felt this was very important artifact, but I somehow threw it as it is not important.
I had an idea, I said to my friend. “If I have got million Pounds, I will use that for excavating. I may dig some gold or something precious.” After we talked how easy to dig something out. And I think I have a great intuition. Then an archaeologist appeared with rectangular shape excavation area. Area was about 3m x 5m. I asked him “How much will it cost to excavate these?” middle aged archaeologist turns older and he didn’t catch what I said. He answered. “Well, 1 year? For …. Hectare.” He said about how long it will take…  but that was a good information.. “oh no.. it will take 1 year?

I am in the open area. Huge stairs.. I felt like I am in the middle point of Monumento Nazionale a Vittorio Emanuele II in Rome. Open space. Quite modern. I can see people walking on the street at the bottom, cars…modern buildings. Head of archaeologist and his female assistant are beside me. Talking something about archaeology. Then I saw Japanese post office in the middle of stairs, open space. Two of them, it was miss match and looked ugly. And I realized that I am in Boston. I felt there must be a lot of Japanese living here now. And it changed a lot. Suddenly a pretty tiny young girl came, and talked to the archaeologist, don’t care about me. My frame of eye view goes from her feet to the thigh and it stopped. She wore skinny jeans and her legs were skinny,too. She was surprised from what archaeologist said and “Fab!” and I thought, “I don’t like a girl says ‘Fab!’”

Reunion dinner (Dream) / 同窓会夕食 (夢） 現実度70% Realistic 70％ in English/Japanese 2015/06/21

I was in the apartment, very tidy and clean. I realized that I was in Japan. Comfortable beige carpet and sofa. The man who had a new born baby and also my old friend was waiting for me in the flat. I thought even he has a baby, somehow I felt he doesn’t have a wife or I didn’t remember. Perhaps I have many single mother friends.

 I heard his wife’s voice of greeting and baby crying. I couldn’t see her face when I greeted. They are doing something in the kitchen. I met other old friends. I sat on sofa. 3,4 people were there. There was a girl arrived. She waved her hand to me, but I didn’t remember her. She wasn’t particularly beautiful in general, but she was an attractive woman to me. I start remembering who she is. She wasn’t in the school, she was in the evening art class.

 H.K sat next to me. He hasn’t changed from primary school. He looked cute, almost like a girl.
I, he and others talk about his hardships. Then I remembered his story, then I asked “how was it?” he says “well, it was tough”.
I asked excitingly “so you could quit the job?” “My boss is always bossy, but when I said I will quit, his attitude completely changed, and saying please don’t quit” he said
Then I said “People are like that, perhaps he had to do your work after”
He replied “Perhaps…” with his face down.

Later he joined Architecture Company and he is working in the area of interior design.

こぎれいなアパートにいる。これは間違いなく日本のアパートと確信する。ふかふかのベージュの絨毯にソファーがある。子供ができた男性の旧友が僕を待つ。子 供ができたというが、シングルマザーが僕の周りに多いせいか、奥さんがいるかどうか記憶にないもしくはいないと勝手に決めつけていた。　

奥さんの声が聞こ え赤ん坊の声も聞こえる。挨拶をするが彼女の顔がみえない。キッチンでどたどたしている。ほかの旧友にも会う。ソファに座る。ほかに3，4人のゲストがい る。どこかでみたことのある女性が家に着く、僕に手をふるが、どこであったか記憶にない。一般的には美しいとは言えないが、僕は素敵な人だと思った。なん となく彼女と会った記憶が戻る。彼女は学校ではなく、美術の夜間学校にいた人だった。H.Kが横に座る。彼は小学生からちっともかわらず。かわいい顔をし て女性みたいだった。

彼の苦労話で花が咲く。そこで、ぼくも知っていたことを思い出し、「どうだった？」ときく「大変だったよ」と彼。　「会社やめれた の？？」僕は興奮して話す。
「普段ボスは偉そうなのに、やめるって瞬間弱くなっちゃてさ、頼むからやめないでっていわれたんだ」と彼。　そして僕は「人はそんなものだよね、たぶん彼が君の仕事をやらなきゃいけなくなったからじゃないか？」　彼はうつむきながら「そうそう」という。

彼は建築関係の仕事にそのあとつき、いまはインテリアの部門にいるようだ。

words and painting by Satoshi Dáte
painting

2015/06/20 Negative is Devil, Positive is God / ネガティブは悪魔、ポジティブは神 in English/ 日本語

We may be trapped by the fear from the ‘TIME’ which is completely false existence that is ‘A weapon’ created by the Devil.

 I dream nightmare, again, it is about my school.

 I had graduated University, but not high school in a dream. I had to choose which Uni I am going. I keep dropping in the school and cannot get out. The class started, but I did not have a note book for that class. What I have was only note with full of scribbling.

The teacher was passing on the left side of my desk. Full of mess.. I was next to the window, near the pillar between the windows. The pillar was a bit behind me. I was afraid that she found out, I am not studying hard or dull (not sure she realise that). The teacher was a lady ( (I wasn’t taught by female teacher in my school in my school in real life, I could not see her face or don’t remember).

On the blackboard, a big painting image appeared. Blackboard was tv monitor or screen to project. She asked us ‘what is this painting?’ suddenly I felt my turned finally came, I know this, I can show off… It is impressionism. I was only doing painting, design and music in the school.

But the teacher said, ‘This is …  Abe’s painting’  He or She is quite famous in the world, but I was like.. who is that?

I was terrified about my future. Horrified… ‘What have I been doing? My body decays… I don’t have much time left… I have to do something right now.. otherwise it will be disaster.’

After I have woken up, I felt, anxiety and worrying, all the negative feeling is The Devil and the positive feeling is the God. When you are afraid and feel terrible, don’t blame yourself, others or the world. Perhaps better to imagine you are fighting with the Devil. Keep your mind steady and beat the Devil and try to reach the God, You will be healed then you influence others, our world will be better.

Why don’t we think we always fight in Holy War.

私たちは時間という錯覚でできた真っ赤な嘘にとらわれ恐怖を植え付けられているかもし

れない。時間は悪魔によって作られた凶器なのかもしれない。

悪夢をみる。まただ。また学校の夢だ。

　

私は高校生でイギリスの大学をでているというのにまだ高校を卒業していない。大学をどこにいくか決めなくてはいけない。私だけ何度も留年して外に出れない。授業がはじまるがその授業のノートがない。あるのは落書きだらけのノートだけ。先生が私のごちゃごちゃになったものが左に置かれている机の狭い横を通る。私は窓際で、窓と窓の間に柱があるところから少し前にいる。先生は女性で（女性の先生に教わったことはない）、私は彼女が通るとき勉強をしてない、そしてできない自分を見られるのが嫌でびくっとする。（彼女はそれに気付いているかどうか知らない）。彼女の顔は覚えていないか見ていない。黒板で大きな絵が映し出される（大きなモニター画面もしくはプロジェクターによって映し出される）。そして「この絵はなんでしょうか？」ときかれる。そこで私は得意になる。これは20世紀の印象派だ！と絵画とデザイン、音楽ばかりにふけっていた学生時代だったために芸術に関してだけは詳しかった。

　ところが先生は「これは阿部　○○さん」の絵です。といわれ、世界的に活躍されている（もしくは他界している）と紹介をうけ、だれだそれは？と思う。

　授業中私はとてつもない恐怖感に襲われる。

「私はいったい今までなにをしてきたんだ？体が腐敗していく。残された時間は少ない。今何かしないととんでもないことになる。」

夢から覚めておもった、恐怖や不安、ネガティブなものは悪魔でポジティブなものは神ではないかと感じた。不安や恐怖心に襲われた時、自分をせめたり、他人を責めたり、世の中を責めたりするのではなく、悪魔と戦っているイメージを描くのがよいかもしれない。自分が平常心を保って、悪を倒し、神に近づこうとすれば自分も癒され、他人にも影響を与え、世界もよりよい世界になる。毎日は聖戦のようだと考えてみてはどうか？

Provocative dream 性的な夢 20150419 in English/in Japanese 日本語

Dreamed provocative dream. Was in Kichijoji (in Tokyo). Went to the store like a hair salon. One of the staff was Polish girl. I knew this girl before. And she was serving her customer but she approached to me and trying to do some treatment(?) she was wearing white nurse uniform with nurse cap. She held my hands and open the shoulder, her face were closer and closer to mine. The wall was behind me. I was embarrassed and didn’t know what to do. It was like dancing pose. So I said “This is like dancing” no answer from her mouth.

She kissed me naturally. And it was so real. I felt a pleasure. A couple times. And she said “it works, it works for me” She may said this “so we have to see each other again” She went back to her customer who has been closing his eyes sitting in the chair. She acted like nothing happened. She keeps continuing her works and she completely ignored me in the shop. And I left my business card. I knew she was going to contact me. I went out. Went out in the maze of arcade. I was may be running. Few people in the arcade. Try to look for other two girls who is having an affair(they were in Kichijoji). And suddenly I realized about the girl who I love the most. And I felt so depressed. What am I doing? Why I am here. I felt lost. Couldn’t find the meaning of the life. Wondering around. Still running or walking where I grew up.

Next day on 2015/04/19  Prediction I don’t find this is so strong prediction.

I watched the youtube video>Utamaro: Yume to shiriseba
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-x_tx4DNapA
by mistake as I left playing other film on youtube and random film started playing
I realized and open the tab of the browser. Then it was provocative scene.
Later I was watching the tv program on youtube >
Takajin no sokomade itte iinnkai bimyo na mondai wo aete nitaku de iinnkai 3/22
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBadEZGBtYc
They talked about
Politicians kiss / affair

性 的な夢をみる。吉祥寺に僕はいた。美容室のようなお店に入る。ポーランド女性の店員がいる。ぼくは彼女を知っているような気がした。彼女は誰か接客してい た。彼女は白い看護婦の加工をしていた。僕の方へやってきて手をつかんできた、体を広げて密着して、顔を僕のところへ近づけてきた。壁が後ろにあり、恥ず かしくてどうしたらいいかわからなかった。ダンスみたいな恰好だったので「ダンスしてるみたいだね」と彼女に言うが、なにも答えがかえってこない。

 自 然に僕にキスをしてきた。それは本当にリアリティーがあった。快感をかんじる。何度かキスをしてきた。彼女は「できてる。わたしにはいい感じだわ」（英語 で）「だからまた会うべきね」といったような気がする。そして彼女は何もなかったかのように目をつむっている客のところへもどる。　そのごお店では完全に 無視をされる。ぼくは自分の名刺をおいてたちさる。必ず彼女が連絡すると確信していた。迷路のようなアーケードへ。僕は走ったり歩いたりしていたような気 がする。ほかの2人の恋人のところへ急いだ（かれらは吉祥寺にいた）。突然自分の最愛の女性のことを思い出す。いったい僕はなにをしているのだろうか？　 ひどい絶望感に襲われて、気力を失う。人生の意味をもうしなう。その気持ちのままただひたすらアーケードの角をまがりジグザクとあるいていった。
次の日2015/04/19　夢と関係することがおきる。（あいまいで強い予知ではないとおもう）

Youtubeのうたまろ　Yume to shiriseba
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-x_tx4DNapA
が流れる。別の映画をつけっぱなしにしていたため、次の映画が勝手にはじまった。性的なシーンが目に入る。
そのあと下記のVideoでキスのはなしが話題になる。
20150322 たかじんのそこまで言って委員会　ビミョーな問題をあえて2択で委員会　3月22日
政治家の路チュー
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBadEZGBtYc

Dreaming the character of a computer game / コンピュータゲームのキャラクターになる夢を見る。2015/04/06

I don’t play computer game, but I dreamt about computer game. My black laser gun, was hit somewhere so no use.. and my friend (?) took me to the weapon shops, I had to go inside. Inside there was a concrete wall, about 2m high with curve. There was a shutter in the middle. 

My friend press the button or something he did… action… open half way so I have to crawl in. I thought this is for security reason. I entred smaller room, there is no customer but a few shop staff, they showed me the same weapon as mine. They asked me if I want to replace it or fixing it. If I given them this old one, I have to pay only 200(don’t know the currency here). I thought it was good deal, but my mind was abstract. I wanted to be cautious. 

They tried to use my gun with some computer simulation software. And one third of shot were going outside of aim, but I thought that should be fine. I asked other weapon. He/She said there is none.
 
5 min later, while I was considering, shop staff told me, there are more out there.

So I came out from small room and went to bigger size area, many were there. And in the window display, I saw a swords. I wanted to buy although it looked like cosplay sword… Can I fight with this? Not sure…

I had to go back to the city or somewhere. Walking the clay road… row of trees on the both left and right sides. Dark brown road, reminds me Delhi.
Dream finishes

―

コンピュータゲームはしない。けれどゲームの夢を見た。 自分の黒いレーザー銃がどこかにぶつかる。壊れたかと思い友達（？）につれられお店に。お店にはおおきなコンクリートの壁がある。２ｍくらいでおおきく ゆっくりとまがっていた。シャッターが中央にあり、友人がボタンをおしたか何かの操作で開けてくれた。半分しかあかなかったのでくぐらなくてはいけなかっ た。用心のためだな？と思う。

さらに誰もいなくてさらに小さい部屋にはいる。スタッフが2，3人いる。ぼくと同じ銃が飾ってある。修理に出すか、新しいも のと交換するかと尋ねられ、新しいものと交換すれば２００（通貨は不明）でいいと。考えたがあたまのなかが夢でぼーっとしてたので、気をつけようと思い。 断った。ほかに武器はないか？ときくとないという。

しかし考えている間5分ほど過ぎて、スタッフがほかの武器が外にあると。小さい部屋をでると、10数人 の客がいて、剣がガラスのウィンドウに飾られていた。何個かあった。買いたいと思ったがみためがコスプレの道具みたいだった。これで戦えるのだろうか？

外に出て中心地にいかなくてはいけなかった。土の道、両脇には木がならんでいる。こげ茶色の道。インドのデリーを思い出す。

pregnancy. 妊娠 2014/02/22-23

 

Dreamed something scary. I feel like I only dream nightmares. I dreamed such a nice dream when I was kid. Flying merry go-round. A beautiful girl who I would never see in the real life. Moving dream and made me cry. Perhaps my real life is getting better?

I was in a boutique. The owner who I work in fashion wasn’t really happy to look at me.

I showed my new fashion work. He didn’t care, he said “ I will be away for 4 days, can you show me later? In fact the quality of your works are not great, I actually wanted to tell you for a long time.”  Then he suggested me to talk to 4 experts.

I had to go to “Zashiki” (Japanese style room). And 4 middle aged men were waiting for me to talk. Then they started nasty conversation to me, it is almost telling me off, in unfair way, they did not want to hear any words from my mouth. They keep telling me what to do.

I was finally snapped and I was telling them off.

I was a little bit irritated about the shop owner didn’t tell me all but let these 4 to tell me. ( I cannot control my anger in a dream)

The scene has changed.

There was a girl I am in love(in the dream). The situation was like this. She wanted to have a baby of mine, but she could not wait for it, so she was going to have a baby with someone she knows around 40-50 year-old guy.

She was sitting and I was, on the table, she held my hands nicely. And she seemed so embrassed, but happy and blushed.

“Mr. Date… I was.. I was pregnant.”

I didn’t know what to say. Should I say congraturations? What do I have to do? Does she mean she wanted to grow the child together? Or she completely forget about my feeling and she was just happy that she was pregnant with other guy? Or simply she was happy to have a baby and wanted to share with me?

I was frightened and I woke up in the middle of night.

恐い夢をみた。最近は悪夢しかみていない。子供のころにメリーゴーランドが空中に浮かんで、見たこともない美しい少女があらわれたりとか、感動して涙が出るような夢ばかりだった。現実の世界が良い方向に向かっている証拠だろうか？

ブティックに居る。日本で僕の服を取り扱っているお店の店長が不機嫌そうに僕をみる。

僕が服をみせるが、「4日間出張に出るからそのあとにしてくれ」といわれる。

あと君の服はクオリティーが低すぎる。まえからいいたかったんだけど。といわれる。

そこであそこに居る4人のエキスパートと喋ってみてくれと、かれは面倒くさそうに代わりに彼らが彼の喋りたいことを話すようだった。

座敷に4人40-50代の男が待っている。

そこからいわゆるいやなかんじの上から目線の日本人の説教が始まる。

なにかをいったら、よくわけのわからない根拠で全てを否定された。最後にはたまりかねず、彼らの言っているナンセンスを押しのけて、ぼくは彼らを説教しだした。

店長は自分からはなしをせず、なぜこの4人を使ったのか、すこし苛立ちを感じた。

（ゆめでは自分の感情が抑えられない）

場面が変る。

夢の中で恋に落ちる女性があらわれる。

夢の設定では彼女は僕の子供が欲しいが待ちきれず、知り合いの中年男性とこどもをつくることに決めていた。彼女は頬赤らめ、恥ずかしそうに、そして嬉しそうに。ぼくの手を握りながら「ねえ、伊達さん。」「わたし妊娠しました」

ぼくは唖然として。おめでとうといったらいいのか、どうなのか困惑した。いったい彼女はぼくの気持ちを忘れて、ただ嬉しい事を伝えたかったのか？僕といっしょに育てたいといいたいのか？　それとも彼と一緒に過ごしたいのか。　それかただ子供を授かった感動をぼくと共感したかっただけなのだろうか？

恐ろしくなりぼくは夜中に目がさめた。

I was cut by knife. ＜夢＞ナイフで切られた 2013/06/22(21night)

Vivid dream… so real.  I was selected by a project to do a sport day (Japanese style). I didn’t really want to do it, as I don’t know what to do. Without so much explanation, I had to stand with everyone on the ground. Put hands together and keep them high position then little move? Suddenly someone hit me with strange stick with brush on top. 

“you fuxxx lost”

He says, I had to be in the corner below the big white square tent, then he start shaving my hair.

 “you lost!” he says. I said “wait! I didn’t know the rule! And I just had a hair cut” he seems very pissed off. 

“You didn’t know the rule? You always like this. And I have told you have to do coach to the batter”

“the what?” I said

“You are supposed to help the batter”

Now I remember, when I was young, I had to do stand next to the batter and give an advice… I don’t know baseball much, how can I advise or cheering. I was shy boy and don’t even know how to hit the ball. How cruel this world, then everyone was complaining to me.

Then the chubby middle-aged guy was in the corner, he grasped a snappy knife, then he start shaving my hair.  

“OK, Ok but not with knife, use shaver!”

He started cutting my hands and neck.  I thought he was sexually attracted as he though I am masochist? When I held the knife so strong, his hand started bleeding, my anger start growing rapidly, 

then I shouted and kicked him. I woke up…

とても現実的な夢。リアルな夢。運動会に出なくてはいけないProjectに参加。よくわからなかったので参加したくなかった。　説明がとても少なく、ぼくは運動場で手を合わせて、手を上に上げて、なにやらへんな動きをしなくてはいけなかった。突然だれかがてっぺんにブラシをつけた棒で僕の頭を叩きつける。

「あんたの負け」

「はあ？」

かれは僕の頭を掴み大きな仮設のテントの中に入れ、バリカンで僕の頭を剃りはじめる。

「ちょっとまってよ。ルールがわからなかったんだって。」

「まけたでしょ？」

強引に剃ろうとする。

「ルール分からないって？君はバッターにコーチもしなきゃいけなかったのに。何もしなかった！」

「コーチ？」

ここでぼくは昔バッターコーチを試合中しなくてはいけないことをおもいだす。そもそも野球もよくわからず、バッティングすらできない僕にコーチなんて無理だ。なにもしないぼくを皆がわるくいって酷く傷ついた事を思い出す。なぜみんなこうやって弱いものをみると上からものを言いたくなるのだろうか？

すこし太った中年の男がテントの端にいる。今度はカッターでぼくの髪を剃り始める。あまりに乱暴なので

「わかったから、バリカンにしてよ！」

そうしたら彼はナイフで僕の手と首を切り始める。彼はぼくをマゾだとでもおもったのだろうか？性的に興奮していると思った。怒りが込上げてきて、彼のナイフを強く抑えるとかれの指から血が出てきた。思い切って「なにすんだこのやろう！」と叫び、彼を蹴り倒す。

そして叫びながら夢から覚める。